How Can I Help My Best Friend, Get her Self Confidence up?!
Question: How Can I Help My Best Friend, Get her Self Confidence up.?
Well, my best friend has decided to go on a diet.
-_- because of a few jerks. The call her a
teddy bear. She like seriously Hates it. So She decided to try a water and fruit diet.
Over the holiday break...i dont think its smart.<_< But she really wants to lose at least 100-150
pounds before June. Now She is 5ft 8inches and 278(apparently).
Now, do i convince her to not or do i help her along.
She wants to lose weight quickly. Now this is mind, she is sick
with a heart condition, asthma, and anemia.
I Love her to death. -___- ive known her forever, shes amazingly clumsy.
And i dont even care if she creeps other people out.
>_< I just want my best friend back, instead of the new weird person.
She wont eat eat at school, she skips breakfast, she calls herself ugly...which shes not...and i hit her everytime she does. Cause it makes me angry when she says that.
Tell me...she looks fine, does she not.? * Mumbles in frustration*
http://s111.photobucket.com/albums/n132/...
Does anyone know how she can lose weight quickly...or
should i just beat her till she gets some sense.? I prefer the second option myself...buuuuut id rather her not be mad at me.
She's massive depressive, >_< i really just miss the old her. Gah!Health Question & Answer
-_- because of a few jerks. The call her a
teddy bear. She like seriously Hates it. So She decided to try a water and fruit diet.
Over the holiday break...i dont think its smart.<_< But she really wants to lose at least 100-150
pounds before June. Now She is 5ft 8inches and 278(apparently).
Now, do i convince her to not or do i help her along.
She wants to lose weight quickly. Now this is mind, she is sick
with a heart condition, asthma, and anemia.
I Love her to death. -___- ive known her forever, shes amazingly clumsy.
And i dont even care if she creeps other people out.
>_< I just want my best friend back, instead of the new weird person.
She wont eat eat at school, she skips breakfast, she calls herself ugly...which shes not...and i hit her everytime she does. Cause it makes me angry when she says that.
Tell me...she looks fine, does she not.? * Mumbles in frustration*
http://s111.photobucket.com/albums/n132/...
Does anyone know how she can lose weight quickly...or
should i just beat her till she gets some sense.? I prefer the second option myself...buuuuut id rather her not be mad at me.
She's massive depressive, >_< i really just miss the old her. Gah!Health Question & Answer
Answers:
Your support is vital in any decision she makes. If she feels she wants to lose weight, you can't stop that. In the current mind set she's in, she is going to find one way to lose it, with or without your help, and without your help, it will most likely be the worst way. Encourage her to join a gym and get a personal trainer. That way she will lose the weight fast, and healthy and the personal trainer will watch out for her health and pull her up if she's starting to do damage to herself.
I understand gym's are expensive and personal trainers at that, so maybe talk to her parents, before you talk to her, and tell them she wants to lose a few pounds. The regular exercise at the gym will also help with her heart condition and asthma.
After talking to her parents, sit her down, with her parents and tell them of your idea. Then organize healthy eating routines, and healthy food. The number one cardinal rule for losing weight is actually EATING food. By her skipping breakfast and not eating during the day, especially at her age, it causes her metabolism to slow down more and more. When she finally does eat something, her body knows it's not going to get anything for a while so it immediately stores the food as fat. also, by slowing her metabolism down, it digests the food slower, which will make her gain weight like crazy.
If she stops eating all together, her body goes into 'hibernation' mode, and will start turning her muscle into fat to compensate for what she isn't giving herself; food.
Hopefully, by this stage, you would have got her diet nice and healthy and planned out.
You say she has depression.? Well, first off, the exercise and healthy diet with help with this enormously. It will release endorphins, which, as we all know, make you happy. It's actually not a myth, it's cold hard fact.
To help with this depressive thinking though, you need to show her, not just tell her, that she really a great person. My little sister went this stage where she thought she couldn't do anything, and it really got her down. I knew for a fact that she was great at this racing game we had on xbox, so one day I sat her down and I said, 'If you can beat me at this game, which I don't think you can, I will shout you lunch at Macca's.' She took the challenge and I let her win. Of course, I pretended as though I was so upset and shocked that she won. This made her feel really good about herself. It was only small, but it's taking small steps to get across the finish line.
You need to find your friends strengths...and challenge her to them. Don't tell her she's good at them...show her. Compare things...make her realize.
As for the jerks who pick on her...let me tell you one thing...in year eight right through to year ten, I was picked on, beaten and bullied for having red hair! Yes, that's right...because I had RED HAIR! I used to come home after being egged and floured and beaten and I would cry myself to sleep. My mother always used to say to me...'Don't pay attention to them, they aren't worth it. You will look back in a couple of years and just laugh at them and consider yourself an idiot for getting upset over it.' I didn't believe her then, but of course, I look back now and go, why didn't I just stand up for myself.? If I did, they would have stopped. Why did I let them get to me.? Because I didn't know any better. Trust me...they really aren't worth it, and she really will look back in a few years and just laugh at it. You, being her close friend, can stand up for her, but not all the time. Maybe teach her to stand up for herself...teach her come backs, things to say, how to defend herself. People suffering depression are usually weak in the area of self defence.
There is no use just beating sense into her. With the way she's thinking, it doesn't work like that, at all. You need to work with her to work against her. Don't completely work against her because she will start venting from you...and soon, you won't know her at all.
You need to keep and eye on her eating habits...bet food like I did with my little sister...she wasn't eating at that stage either but she ate that McDonalds because she knew she earned it. Do some research on the internet and find out things about eating disorders, OCD, depression and anxiety disorder and show them to her. Show her pictures of anorexia and bulimia. You need to let her know what she is doing to herself, because I don't think she even realises. It may be just small things now, but they escalate and turn into the worse situations. You want to let her know, not to scare her, but to inform her...
I hope everything goes well...best of luck with it all....Health Question & Answer
I understand gym's are expensive and personal trainers at that, so maybe talk to her parents, before you talk to her, and tell them she wants to lose a few pounds. The regular exercise at the gym will also help with her heart condition and asthma.
After talking to her parents, sit her down, with her parents and tell them of your idea. Then organize healthy eating routines, and healthy food. The number one cardinal rule for losing weight is actually EATING food. By her skipping breakfast and not eating during the day, especially at her age, it causes her metabolism to slow down more and more. When she finally does eat something, her body knows it's not going to get anything for a while so it immediately stores the food as fat. also, by slowing her metabolism down, it digests the food slower, which will make her gain weight like crazy.
If she stops eating all together, her body goes into 'hibernation' mode, and will start turning her muscle into fat to compensate for what she isn't giving herself; food.
Hopefully, by this stage, you would have got her diet nice and healthy and planned out.
You say she has depression.? Well, first off, the exercise and healthy diet with help with this enormously. It will release endorphins, which, as we all know, make you happy. It's actually not a myth, it's cold hard fact.
To help with this depressive thinking though, you need to show her, not just tell her, that she really a great person. My little sister went this stage where she thought she couldn't do anything, and it really got her down. I knew for a fact that she was great at this racing game we had on xbox, so one day I sat her down and I said, 'If you can beat me at this game, which I don't think you can, I will shout you lunch at Macca's.' She took the challenge and I let her win. Of course, I pretended as though I was so upset and shocked that she won. This made her feel really good about herself. It was only small, but it's taking small steps to get across the finish line.
You need to find your friends strengths...and challenge her to them. Don't tell her she's good at them...show her. Compare things...make her realize.
As for the jerks who pick on her...let me tell you one thing...in year eight right through to year ten, I was picked on, beaten and bullied for having red hair! Yes, that's right...because I had RED HAIR! I used to come home after being egged and floured and beaten and I would cry myself to sleep. My mother always used to say to me...'Don't pay attention to them, they aren't worth it. You will look back in a couple of years and just laugh at them and consider yourself an idiot for getting upset over it.' I didn't believe her then, but of course, I look back now and go, why didn't I just stand up for myself.? If I did, they would have stopped. Why did I let them get to me.? Because I didn't know any better. Trust me...they really aren't worth it, and she really will look back in a few years and just laugh at it. You, being her close friend, can stand up for her, but not all the time. Maybe teach her to stand up for herself...teach her come backs, things to say, how to defend herself. People suffering depression are usually weak in the area of self defence.
There is no use just beating sense into her. With the way she's thinking, it doesn't work like that, at all. You need to work with her to work against her. Don't completely work against her because she will start venting from you...and soon, you won't know her at all.
You need to keep and eye on her eating habits...bet food like I did with my little sister...she wasn't eating at that stage either but she ate that McDonalds because she knew she earned it. Do some research on the internet and find out things about eating disorders, OCD, depression and anxiety disorder and show them to her. Show her pictures of anorexia and bulimia. You need to let her know what she is doing to herself, because I don't think she even realises. It may be just small things now, but they escalate and turn into the worse situations. You want to let her know, not to scare her, but to inform her...
I hope everything goes well...best of luck with it all....Health Question & Answer
well just tell her shes pretty and dont say shes not fat because that well just make her feel bad because its a lie , the truth is that she is overweight ,i suggest you support your friend with her decision and help her lose weight with activities like dancing walking around the mall or something that way she will lose weight slowly without doing any harm to herself and hopefully start to regain her confidence .Health Question & Answer
pic's not really much help.
but you've got to support her. she'll eventually stop and if things go bad you have to support her through that as well.
also dramatic weight loss often results in equally dramatic weight gain!Health Question & Answer
but you've got to support her. she'll eventually stop and if things go bad you have to support her through that as well.
also dramatic weight loss often results in equally dramatic weight gain!Health Question & Answer
let her do what she wants
it looks like she can loose some weight
and telling her that you wish she wasnt this way, would probably hurt her feelings
LET HER DO IT
ITS HER LIFE
NOT YOURSHealth Question & Answer
it looks like she can loose some weight
and telling her that you wish she wasnt this way, would probably hurt her feelings
LET HER DO IT
ITS HER LIFE
NOT YOURSHealth Question & Answer
oooh i cant really tell how fat she is from that pic can u PLZ add another pic!Health Question & Answer
tell her to join a sport..keep busy..this will keep her mind off of food. guide her on how to eat. If she can't join a sport then go on walks w/ her. Make sure she gets some physical activity. about an hour or more everyday. Have her eat salads for meals. Tell her being at a healthy weight will only benefit her in the long run. It will help her w/ her heart condition, her asthma, and anemia. Anemia is lack of iron in the blood, that means she needs to eat more spinach. Maybe take her to a doctor or someone who can make a eating guideline.Health Question & Answer
guess your friend refuses to listen as she is too desperate to loose weight due to the comments put upon her. she does not take your advices seriously because she might think that you do not understand her because you do not share similar problems. sit down with her, let her know how important she is to you, let her know that you care. tell her you know how she feels and work out something together with her, example exercise together. also let her know that her attitude plays an important role in becoming attractive, not just her figures. there are tonnes of people with nice figures that have never been the central of attraction while others who seems to be normal have always been under spot light.Health Question & Answer
my best friend is the same,
shes skinny (size 8 NZ.. like 110 pounds and about 165cm tall)
and she thinks she's overweight and ugly, she has anemia
and i know that her self confidence is down so she sits in the sun (which isnt good for her) and doesnt eat ANYTHING.
i've found forcing them to eat makes them want to eat less,
but encouraging the silly diet hurts - coz you know they dont need to.
you need to talk to her seriously, tell her exactly how you feels - show her some fab pictures of herself so she feels better
and if you pay a little attention and notice the little things "oh sarah your hair looks nice" or "ooh is that a new dress.?"
just to boost their confidence really helps
hope shes ok =DHealth Question & Answer
shes skinny (size 8 NZ.. like 110 pounds and about 165cm tall)
and she thinks she's overweight and ugly, she has anemia
and i know that her self confidence is down so she sits in the sun (which isnt good for her) and doesnt eat ANYTHING.
i've found forcing them to eat makes them want to eat less,
but encouraging the silly diet hurts - coz you know they dont need to.
you need to talk to her seriously, tell her exactly how you feels - show her some fab pictures of herself so she feels better
and if you pay a little attention and notice the little things "oh sarah your hair looks nice" or "ooh is that a new dress.?"
just to boost their confidence really helps
hope shes ok =DHealth Question & Answer
Hi,
Yes she's pretty cute actually..
Once I've had the same problem with my best friend..she began a diet and lost a few pounds..but she wasn't happy because she was always saying that nobody looked at her cause she was too fat and no one would love her..and bla bla bla..
So, i tried lots of different ways to help her getting better..but every night she was crying telling me she couldn't afford it anymore..
so I thought the only right thing i could do to help her forget her problems was to take her out..
so we went in a disco-pub and she was dancing and she was sooo happy!! I was really happy for her, you know..I hadn't seen her like this for a while..
and then..she maked o0ut with a guy, and since that night she's completely different caus now she knows that there are guys who like her!
Hope this will help you!Health Question & Answer
Yes she's pretty cute actually..
Once I've had the same problem with my best friend..she began a diet and lost a few pounds..but she wasn't happy because she was always saying that nobody looked at her cause she was too fat and no one would love her..and bla bla bla..
So, i tried lots of different ways to help her getting better..but every night she was crying telling me she couldn't afford it anymore..
so I thought the only right thing i could do to help her forget her problems was to take her out..
so we went in a disco-pub and she was dancing and she was sooo happy!! I was really happy for her, you know..I hadn't seen her like this for a while..
and then..she maked o0ut with a guy, and since that night she's completely different caus now she knows that there are guys who like her!
Hope this will help you!Health Question & Answer