Punished for asking for help! Long but please read.?!

Question: Punished for asking for help! Long but please read..?
I am sorry this post is long. Please bear with me.

I was seeing my Key worker (who counselled me) for nearly a year and was still only learning to trust her. In recent weeks I have been struggling I would have rang perhaps once or twice a week (as she always said to ring if in distress). Last week I was in contact with the home treatment team 3 times due to feeling deeply distressed and suicidal. They spoke to me on the phone and told me to go take a tablet, go to sleep and that they would get my keyworker to ring the next day- therefore she would ring me (not my choice but home treatments), all I was doing was doing was ringing home treatment as I felt a danger to myself, I was not doing it to be in contact with my keyworker as that would have been stupid.

On wednesday this week I was told my keyworker was no longer my key worker, i wont ever see her again (psychiatrists choice) and that I had no right to an explaination or to say goodbye and that I would be given a new key worker. This has shattered me completely.

I don't think I did anything wrong, I wasnt out of order ringing when I deseperately needed help, I wasnt pestering her or anyone..I as crying for help and yet my psychiatrist has punished me for asking for help because I persume and am under the impression he thinks I have contacted my key worker too much, which I don't believe is true.

I am not a bad client, I am curtious to people, always make my appointments, try to help myself etc. The psychiatrist who seen me in hospital after my overdose said that even my key worker seemed shocked.

I feel crushed and please dont give me a lecture about being attached because unless you have seen a counsellor/key worker/psychairts etc for a long period and trusted personal information with them you will never understand what its like to loose them, never mind to loose them without any notice.

I have borderline personality disorder & depression and I feal rejection very strongly, I also have problems trusting people for various reasons and now its even stronger than ever.

Did I deserve that.?
only a few weeks ago my psychiatrist told me nothing could be done to help me and that hurt so much but I can't believe he has done this to me. It's not the right decision and I dont feel I want to see anyone anymore because I am too afraid of this happening and to trust and be hurt which continuously hurts.

Am I wrong in thinking this is awful and wrong.?

Health Question & Answer

Ultimately you have to decide whether or not you believe your psychiatrist has your best interest at heart. One thing is certain, whatever decisions your psychiatrist makes on your behalf, you shouldn't look at them as being rewards or punishments. If he makes a bad decision, it's because he's making bad decisions not because he's out to get you.

If you feel you can trust your psychiatrist, try to work through the emotions and trust that you will in fact get better someday.

If, deep down, you feel that you psychiatrist is not competent at working with you or anyone, request a new psychiatrist. If you have valid reasons for your request, a mental health agency will probably try to match you up with some else.

Personally, I feel your case was mishandled. If you were feeling suicidal and had a recent history of having attempted to commit suicide, you should have been hospitalized.

Given the fact that you have borderline personality disorder, it should be expected that you would struggle with unhealthy attachments to your counselors. It is improper to handle this by regularly switching up workers. At that rate, you'll never build trust with anyone and are unlikely to make advances.

No mental health worker should ever tell you that there is no hope for you. Saying that there is no help for you unless you're willing to undergo treatment is one thing, flat out saying there is no hope is another.

Ultimately, since no one here can be sure all of the details of what's happening to you, only you can make the decision as to whether or not your psychiatrist is working in your best interest or not.Health Question & Answer

You are totally not wrong or awful for thinking this! I too have Borderline Personality Disorder as well as Depression and Anxiety. So I know exactly how you feel. And having this comes with rejection, abandonment and not trusting. Therefore, you will feel like this. This is not your fault and is not your fault that you were diagnosed with this either! Its just something that happened. God gave these ailments to you b/c he knew you were strong enough to deal with it! Thats the way I have to look at it.
Lastly, you should know that psychiatrists, therapists or key workers all leave their jobs at some point or another. Because they leave for another job or to do research or go back to school. I know this b/c my psychiatrist just left for research. I feel like I have been shot in the back! Like I just got to know her and now she's leaving me! You should know this--they are not leaving there jobs because of you in no means! It just so happens that they have another opportunity that came along when you were with them.
Don't dread on the things you cannot change. Try to look on the bright side of things. Things will get better for you I am sure of it!
Good Luck and be sure to smile once and awhile!!! :)Health Question & Answer

Hi there...

Firstly I'm glad you're reaching out for support with this as it's not nice to feel the negative things you're feeling. I have some support from the CMHT myself and so far it is very good but it's important to be aware of some of the following issues...

Things to be aware of when obtaining professional services from the NHS, CMHT etc.

You have to be realistic about things. There is no perfect service and a key worker or other allocated person can have their job changed or be reallocated at any time without you needing to be informed or consulted. This almost happened to me a few months ago with my Occupational Therapist but when I first had help from her I checked it out to make sure I was clear in my understanding of the kind of service I could expect. I agree its not good when this kind of thing happens and it can cause upset but sadly there is no perfect system and to have a situation where every client has to be consulted before a psychiatrist can change or decide something would be too awkward to arrange and administer. Although it's hard to deal with you have to accept that this is just the way it is with this kind of service.

Try not to take it personally - what's happened is nothing about you as a person or your illness. It's just part of how the system works.

Think of the things it could be which are unconnected with you personally. For example... The key worker's personal circumstances could have changed thus making it awkward or impossible to work with you. Such as sickness or change in family situations etc. My OT would not discuss personal circumstances with me as it's basically none of my business etc.

Anyway I hope this helps you to be more realistic in your outlook and you'll be allocated another key worker as soon as they can arrange it.

Take care and hope things work out soon.

EdwardHealth Question & Answer

Have you looked at the website of the charity Mind.? You can also phone Saneline, whose number you can also get from a Google search.
Mind campaigns for better mental health services and they have support and action groups and publish a lot of free information leaflets.
I can't think of anything else at the moment, but good luck.Health Question & Answer

I am sorry that you are suffering. You do not deserve to be treated in this manner. Nobody deserves to hear that they cannot be helped. These people are not very professional. If it is possible, can't you see another psychiatrist, your current one is not working for you. I know it may be difficult but do not give up, there are very good medical professionals out there and with a little time and patience you will find one who can work with you. Good luck.Health Question & Answer

hun you feel it so badly because you have BPD

its not your fault and you shouldn't not continue to get help for your disorder a lot of people with BDP get turned away for many reasons and don't seek help any longer because they feel rejected you're not being rejected its not your fault but it is work to your key worker they cant pick and choose what they have to do

you feel so bad because you have BPD which involves a deep fear of loneliness and rejection so you may think you have been rejected but you haven't

take your medication and don't worry i'm sure you're new key worker will be even better :) Health Question & Answer

Why all the fuss about a Key worker being reassigned.?
This kind of stuff happens all the time in life. You need some perspective & stop making drama for yourself.Health Question & Answer

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